2019-03-12 journal two

I can’t do anything right.  I don’t know things, and I am fucking lonely.  I find a friend who is in the same situation as me.  We get along, she is in the same type of relationship, she gets it.  I tell daddy how I meet her, on some stupid app when I was bored and reading people’s secrets.   I did nothing wrong.  I asked daddy’s thoughts.  And he blows up and tells me we are done for the second time in a week.  I can’t take this   I am absolutely destroyed.  I always fuck everything up.  Always.  All I want is daddy, always   I pledge my love and loyalty over and over daily. And I just want daddy and our life we have planned .  Maybe he would be better off without me. Maybe everyone would. Maybe everybody would.  I can’t seem to get anything right.  Alone again.  Probably alone forever, it’s what I deserve.  Maybe everyone was right since I was little telling me I wasn’t worth it. Maybe I’m not worthy to wear his collar. I can’t seem to make him happy and please him. I’m just going to shut everything down for a few days.  You know where to find me if you want


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